Thursday, September 9, 2010

You broke me, I thought I knew you well.

You look at me and continuously, you tell me that you love me. If you love me than wouldn't I have a solid resting place in your heart? But where am I in there? I search but to no avail, I'm nowhere to be found. I struggle to see the point of you being with me, if you are drowning me? If you cared about me shouldn't you be trying to lift me up above the rest of the world? Why is it that I go to bed crying because you can't do the things that lovers do? Walking down the sidewalk two by two, but where are we? It's never us two. You say the word sorry over and over again. That word no longer has any meaning to me. You can't tear my heart and then apologize and think I am going to be okay. I'm not ever going to be the same. I'm going to be stronger. I used to think you being with me is enough. But I know I can do better, I know I can survive without you. We are over now, I couldn't watch myself fall anymore. You treated me like shit and then you broke me. Don't come back, ever. 

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Dumbledore's dreams.

I see you and I know you can see me too, but you can't hear me. You've put me on mute. I could scream at you, but all you could see is the tears streaming down my face. You try to avert the pain stinging in my eyes, but thats so hard when it's so intense. You sit there, but you can't talk. Why won't you talk to me? Why won't you tell me what's wrong? I'd do anything for you don't you understand that? Please, I just need you to let me in and let me stay. When I think of you I just think of your body there's no soul left, there is no life left inside your eyes and that scares me. Actually, it kills me inside. I just wish I knew you and now I'm afraid it's too late.  It's like in Harry Potter when you look into Dumbledore's dreams and you can't talk or act you can only watch what's happened in the past and you can't stop the conflict. You watch history repeat itself, but you do nothing. It's as if I have to violently shake you to wake you. Wake you from what? You don't sleep. You don't live anymore. I want to talk to you but you are too confused. Do you know where you are? Who was your first kiss? Why don't you show me, you love me? Grandpa, do you know who I am?